Kururi
Once upon a time in a mid June not so long ago, a mystical creature happened upon something fabulous: The Dollars Chat. This mystical creature was made of sugar, spice, and pure AWESOME. Her name was Kururi, and she had come on a fateful day indeed. As she strolled her way into one of the rooms, she came across a meadow, and within this meadow was a certain demon bitch named Akuma. This ‘Akuma’ was currently engaged in a frolic (see footnotes below for any italicized and underlined words) with another user, NT. For some reason beyond the current research of how the human mind works, Kururi decided to stick around despite this welcome. And then, through a series of events that could only be described as a complete clusterfuck of random, she became known throughout as a chat whore in league with Akuma (though this title –inmyopinion- is no longer valid). It was a wild summer of sex, drugs, and Blue-Chan, within which Kururi met some people she will never forget – though whether this is a good or bad thing is up to you. As we deeper explore the life of Kururi on Dollars Chat, Skype, and/or Facebook, keep in mind that these events are chat based and none of this has occurred in real life unless otherwise stated. (I’m not a whore; I just do whore-y things, people). : D A Brief Overview of Kururi’s life outside dollars In the real world (Why does that exist again?), Kururi lives and works in Canada; in fact, she has all her life. Some users seem to think this is perhaps a bad thing –coughDuckieAkumaDeetEtc- and thus make certain unappreciated ‘Canadian jokes’ which either amuse Kururi, or piss her and every other Canadian in the room off. These jokes span from the usual (igloos, moose, maple syrup) to the ones that no one finds funny but the Americans (how I say ‘bag’ for instance). These jokes tend to cause a more or less friendly banter between us (normally ending in Kururi bringing up Canada’s healthcare and the American’s having nothing to say). The exact location of Kururi in Canada is a secret (not really, but whatever), but she does live about twenty minutes away from HomoMilk. And within her city (not town, igloo emporium, or anything else like that) she works for a dreadful American company that invokes slave labor and pays minimum wage: Starbucks. Kururi hates her job, as it often causes some of the following symptoms: · Lack of sleep · Lack of a social life · Espresso over dosage (which has a few symptoms of its own) · Procrastination (yes, I am blaming this on Starbucks) · Vomiting · Stress · Anger · Angst · Useless arguments · Death Kururi’s Love Life This section covers the many relationships of Kururi, though it is not 100% accurate as there have been too many relationships ''for Kururi too really pay attention to. One of the first of Kururi’s partners was NT. Kururi isn’t really sure how this came about (/lies), but it involved rape, ice cream, honey, Akuma, and later, Duckie. It ended in a messy break up type thing that NT felt needed to happen (during which he chose Akuma over me? -laughs-). Nothing really came of this in the end though, and nobody harbors any bad feelings for each other. Pity. Before, during, and after Kururi’s time with NT, she had many ''lovers ''including, but not limited to: Mikado. , HomoMilk, Blueshi, Mikado-Kun, ….50 other Shizuo’s, and some randoms. Her favorite of this small handful was HomoMilk, who wrote her a poem (on a dare) and often plays/played dress-up and was forced to use great pick-up lines and rap/sing on Skype. As it would be a shame not to document this, here is HomoMilk’s lovely poem: Kururi is a very eminent person to everyone around her, She is like the colour black; she mixes and gets along easily with others and is well loved, and at times can be quite emotional, delicate and fragile. Like dolphins, a gentle creature, yet aggressive when provoked, an animal that likes to have its fun, surprising the most out of people. Like surprise candy, you never know what you're going to get, like a mystery flavor of gum. You never know what you're going to get, and it keeps you guessing. But even though you ended up having a flavor that you didn't like, you end up coming back for more. That's how Kururi is with everyone around her; She is a very surprising person, and I love everything about her; A best friend, a stranger, an enemy, or a rival... After her time with these silly boys, and a night of ''Girl Talk, Kururi married Anima. It was a lovely union, starting with the words, “Screw boys, let’s get married!” And a sexy Vegas honeymoon enjoyed by the two of them, Deet, Akuma, and Duckie. This was by far, Kururi’s most successful relationship for many reasons; first, it was an open relationship, secondly, they never actually got hitched - as the wedding planner failed at her job – and third, Kururi and Anima barely ever saw each other. THIS WORKS. THIS SHOULD BE THE BASIS OF EVERY RELATIONSHIP. Unfortunately, Kururi became attached to the other man, Shizu-Chan, and being the good person she is, broke it off with Anima; but not before engaging in some steamy non-whore makeup sex (shopping and ice cream). Currently, Kururi is engaged to Shizu, who she met on August 28th. On their anniversary, Shizu was supposed to propose, but he ditched and did it the Sunday after it he proposed and Kururi accepted. Shizu is the most adorable thing in the world, and Kururi feels lucky to have him <3. Even though sometimes they argue –coughandbythatImeanalwayscough – they make a good couple… (/has no idea). Kururi and Shizu-Chan As stated above, Kururi is engaged to Shizu-Chan. In this section, we will delve more into the mysteries that surround Shizu! Shizu-Chan is a shy boy (quoted from his friendwhowillnotbenamed), who has anger issues and often can be caught face-desking or dying. He is all drama all the time, and it’s absolutely adorable. Though he fails hardcore at relationships, and Kururi is 90% sure that she’s the man in their relationship. But he is a sweetheart when he wants to be. ^.^ Shizu-Chan is known around the chat to be the fail-man, or the King of Moobs. He often speaks in innuendos and doesn’t realize it, and has randomly AMAZING fail moments, such as, but not limited to: · RAWROROWR (on Skype) · Pitching ‘tents’ at the ‘park’ · Drastically Intensely · “''Moob''” · Purple Day (Only known by Kururi) · Being oblivious to everything · Storming off in anger literally EVERY night · Never logging off · His gay moments with TKP · Pretty much every day of his life <3 (ILU SHIZU) ((MORE WILL COME LATER, I AM TOO LAZY TO FINISH NOW)) Kururi and her family <3 The Orihara's are a strange bunch with charming personalities. Kururi has a brother, Izaya (cereal-box), and a twin sister, Mairu. Kururi and Izaya do not get along. Kururi has tried and tried to be nice to her dear brother but he seems to hate her for some reason, despite her amazingly uncanny awesomeness. This could be because she takes every chance she gets to make sarcastic remarks at him and bug him, but she wont jump to any conclusions. Mairu does not come out to chat very often, but when she does, Kururi and her get into all sorts of mischeif and have trashed peoples houses on more than one occasion. Sometimes, Kururi and Izaya can be seen getting along (for a short periods). This first occured after Kururi transformed into puppy-Kururi and Izaya turned into Nekozaya. Normally cats and dogs don't get along but for some reason they did. When they both changed back Izaya and Kururi enjoyed a family bonding moment in which Kururi stabbed Shizuo-san. The family bonding consisted of attempted cooking ending in Izaya's flaming microwave being thrown out the window and setting Shizuo-san on fire which in turn ruined Izaya's bedroom. Kururi is not sure if Izaya will allow any more family bonding after this. The larger family that Kururi is less willing to be a part of is the 'Awkward Family.' Kururi is not even sure how this family works, all she knows is that EVERYTHING IS INCEST NOW. It annoys her that her fooling around is reguarded as incest constantly, but it doesn't bother her enough to stop. Off the top of her head, Kururi can name PinkIzaya, Fridge, Duckie, HomoMilk, Deet, Blushi, Lady, Kasuka, Quiet Shizuo, Rose, Tsundere, Egg, Izaya, and Akuma as her relatives. Apparently, some strange phenomenon in history resulted in Izaya being Akuma's father. Kururi for a long time wondered how this was possible, as CB is the gayest man alive, but then someone pointed out that he reproduces asexually. Unfortunately this is not all possible for a male human, which is why it resulted in the horrible creature, Akuma. Kururi and other users Kururi has developed many other friendships with users that are strictly kept to a friends only level. These users include Duckie, Human (who has been on once or twice), Deet, and many more. Duckie and Kururi have a sort of frienemies relationship as they often fight over pointless things, but normally they have fun together making fun of people and whatnot. Other users that she does not know as well but still thinks are awesome are skRose (who is adorable and cuddles me~ <3), Egg (daughter of Duckie), fridge (he's amusing) and some other ones she can't think of. There are also some users that she dislikes, but Kururi is refraining from naming names. *coughAkumacough* (<3) This 'nameless' user has been established as a whore in Kururi's mind, and she randomly hits on HomoMilk (grrr) and is always engaging NT in sex whenever the two are together. However, this 'person' does have some qualities that are okay and Kururi and her have some similar tastes in their ways of getting things done. Kururi, Akuma, Duckie, and Deet When all the girls get together in a room, fun ensues. Epic times are had that can not be explained the next day. These events include tambourines, tea, maid outfits, corsets, fancy words, tango, men, girl talk, and the power of youtube. These female bonding moments are often momentous occations that are divine and wonderful, but sometimes they can get a bit too rowdy for the others in the room, which results in things like trolling (us trolling them, of course) or just insane non-sensical chatter and fast-chat. Despite the fact that Kururi, Akuma, and Duckie are involved in a 'love triangle' with NT (even though Akuma is the only one who really cares), the three still get along when the boy-toys aren't present. Kururi and food/drink products One weakness Kururi has is her love for certain foods and drinks. HomoMilk, of course, goes without saying, but Kururi also has a soft spot for some other things. One drink she has a keen obsession with is tea; drugged or clean. Kururi is often seen sipping tea when things get boring and hallucinating soon after (with the mushroom tea, anyways). Another product she has a strange obsession with is honey sticks, and will guard them possesively if you give her one. Ice cream has become another thing that she 'enjoys' greatly, though some may think she goes overboard when she eats it. There are also some other food and drinks that she has small obsessions for, but nobody has discovered them yet. Kururi Facts~ Gender: Female Age: 18 Birthday: August 5th Fav color: Orange, of course~ Fav Food: Grapes Likes: Reading, awesomness, adorable things, puppies, me, clothes, bridge jumping, trolling, and lots more~ Dislikes: Spammers, whores, unkind people, bad grammar, PEOPLE WHO TALK IN CAPS, and the list goes on... User Comments~? Feel free to spam me with hate mail and love, dearies~ FFTROLLFFF: FFFFFFFFFFFF TROLL LOVE KURURI. FFFFFFF ALL DAY AND ALL NIGHT FFFFFFFFFF HER WITH LOVE. FFFFFFFF. Category:Users Category:Durarara!